If your parenting methods include abuse of any kind; physical, sexual, emotional or verbal, please get help to stop as soon as possible. Adults are supposed to safeguard and protect the young among us. You may be repeating patterns learned in your family of origin or not know any other methods of parenting.

I have included a number of different approaches to discipline that wont damage the spirit of your precious children, but none will work if you havent acknowledged that what you were doing in the past was harmful and that your family deserved a more nurturing environment. I am not a psychologist or a counselor, but I know there are good ones out there who can assist you in shifting your paradigm of discipline to a more loving and respectful relationship. You owe it to your children and yourself to break the bonds and cycle of abuse and get help. Change is possible; I see it every day in families I work with. You are a good, kind and loving person or you wouldnt be reading this book and attending these classes, so I encourage you to take the steps that will change the lives of your children and their children.

You can do it. I believe in you.

A list of talking points to help you discipline without damage is listed below.

The meaning of the word discipline Is your love unconditional Be both firm and kind in discipline Adults also need time out Teach them that mistakes are never final We all need boundaries Consistent does not mean rigid Discipline but never punish Catch them doing things right Teach without anger, shame or blame There is no such thing as a good or bad child Issue a warning, but mean it Spanking and screaming are not effective teachers Eliminate Whos at Fault? Be aware of your body and facial language Treat each child as an individual Be careful of abusive adjectives, they really hurt Recognize effort and improvement Dont punish them for telling the truth Deal with problems in private, praise in public Distinguish between minor mishaps and major problems Teach them to forgive and ask for forgiveness Be curious not furious-Ask questions

This handout has been prepared for you by Judy H. Wright, Parent Educator. It is part of a new book, Raise a Confident Child which will be coming out soon. For Free reports and to subscribe to the Artichoke-finding the heart of the story in the journey of life please join us at www.ArtichokePress.com

Judy H. Wright

Judy is a parent educator, family coach, and personal historian who has written more than 20 books, hundreds of articles and speaks internationally on family issues, including end of life. . Active as a PBS-Ready to learn consultant, she works with Head Start organizations and child care resource centers. She and Dwain, her husband of 40 years, have six grown children and seven grandchildren. They consider their greatest success in life that their children like themselves and each other.

The symbol of the artichoke has great meaning for Judy in her teaching and writing. As she works with families, she sees that frequently only the outer edges are exposed and they can be prickly and sometimes bitter to the taste. But, as you expose the artichoke and people to warmth, caring, and time, gradually the leaves begin to open and expose the real treasure­the heart.

The artichoke also became a teaching lesson when Judy, with her young family, moved into military housing in California to find Artichokes in their yard. Given that it takes two years for the vegetable to flower, the original gardener never got to see the seeds of her labor. Many times, our actions and reactions in life are felt by people we will never meet, but we plant the seeds of kindness anyway.

You will enjoy Judy's approachable manner, wonderful storytelling and common-sense solutions gleaned from working with hundreds of families and organizations just like yours. Your encounter with Judy will leave you feeling inspired, entertained and especially motivated. Visit Judy's website for excellent references and a full listing of books, workshop topics, tele-classes and testimonials.

To make arrangements for your group or organization to enjoy having Judy present a keynote address, workshop or training session, please contact her at her website, via phone at (406) 549-9813 or via email at Judy@ArtichokePress.com

?Finding the heart of the story in the journey of life.?